May 21, 2012 Commitment

Dear God,

Woo! Day 2! I hope I can continue this streak.
Commitment is so hard these days. It's easy to say I love you or I promise this and that. It's easy to mean it in the moment. But what happens when that moment passes?
The feelings are gone. What happens to the commitment, the promises?
It gets tossed out the window for the most part. Commitment isn't about making the feelings last. To me, it's sticking by the person's side even though the feelings faded after a fight or a hot person walks by. That's commitment.
It's easy to say things are great when it's a smooth sail. The hard part is staying there when there's a bump.
It's difficult to stay in one place because everyone has this desire to be free and see the world. The unknown is so inviting. It's the attractive person you've been eyeing or something you've always wanted to do.
But what if the freedom and fun you're looking for is the person next to you? What if, when given the chance, they can become your world that you want to see and explore?
Often times we leave the fun and freedom we already have for something that looks good and is risky. Sure the unknown is attractive to the explorer inside of us, but we shouldn't judge a book by its cover. What if the book stinks once you open it? By the time you discover it's rotten, the fairytale you once had is gone. That's why it's so hard to let your desires go.
You think you'll regret missing the opportunity and it just so happens that all the negative things about your significant other are popping into your mind and you're justifying your want to explore. We often forget to look beside us.
The best adventure of your life may be laying next to you right now. Or sitting in the other room. Possibly reading my little rants with you.
Why give it up for something that's a dead end? Is it really worth it? Is the thrill and excitement that lasts for a month worth the lifetime of love you've built?
I think I just found the solution for most broken relationships! ;)
At the same time, this could go both ways. What if the person next to you isn't so great, and the unknown is your fairytale? Don't look at it with a mind that's ready to pounce at the unknown though. Really look.
Is the person next to you cruel? Harsh? Degrading? Don't be overdramatic though. If she insulted your Call of Duty skills or he said he didn't like your shirt, that doesn't mean he or she is a bad person. Did you catch that? That's NOT being mean as much as you'd like to consider it that way.
I'm talking about serious stuff. Emotional abuse, verbal abuse, physical abuse, anything like that. I've been there, I know the pain. I also know how hard it is to let go of that person even though they've hurt you. Your self worth and value goes down in your mind and you don't believe anyone else can possible care for you now.
Letting go becomes hard even if your fairytale is trying to rescue you.

I guess I just don't understand how we miss blessings in our lives, the ones by our side and the ones that are in front of us.
I hope we can start opening our eyes to the blessings around us.

Thank you God for all your blessings.

Love you,

Amen.